Sorin and Baker Response

I wasn’t too thrilled about the two pieces by Randall and Torrey. They lacked description and the stories/narrators did not capture me in the way that Serin and Baker’s piece did. I noticed how both those authors did a lot of telling and not showing, Randall in particular. The opening lines confused me at first, and didn’t flow cohesively with the rest of the piece. I enjoyed Sorin’s piece more because it described scenes in more detail, and didn’t throw random words across the page like Randall did. It was more engaging by having clever lines as to draw the reader in, for example in the section titled: “Photograph of Walter Griffin at the Pool” when the narrator says, “Is that your back in the dark one-piece bathing suit? Maybe you’re not there” (197) when describing the moment when her crush is more interested in her younger sister than her. My favorite section is the last one (simply called: Snakes) where the narrator talks about snakes and how one becomes a pet, but then gets lost and pops! out of the closet by surprise. I like the last line, “Your mother opens the front door and it slips into its world” (198). Sorin’s use of second person really drew me in, and it the prose worked because it encompassed the narrator’s point of view, describing snippets of time in an almost linear fashion. The dynamics between the sisters feels realistic and the author portrays middle class, suburban family life fairly well.


Baker’s piece, “Losing Shawn, Losing Me,” was on another level. Even though it was in third person, she channeled her younger, eighteen year old self extremely well. She captured life in the 1960s and the harsh norms for women that came with it. First of all, I noticed that the color, “green” was repeated twice in this story; once when she is describing the hospital where she gives birth to her son, “The walls were painted a lighter shade of green, strangely soothing” (79). The blanket that she makes for her son is also described as having, “a pale green ribbon” running through it. She goes onto saying that the, “ribbon separates the blanket from a slightly ruffled hem. It is beautiful. I will wrap my baby up and never let him go” (83). The color green usually represents positive regrowth and is a symbol for nature. That is what Debbie has always wanted for not just her child, but herself as well.


The college reference on page 83 reminded me of my first day at Mills, as a little ‘ol Freshwoman. When she described what the place looks like a few pages later, well, that spoke to me because I have experienced what it is like to live with a bunch of other young women who I’ve never met before. The house she stayed in to “keep her secret” from the outside world seemed to be not such a bad place, but I think that Debbie questioned her mother’s decision and willingly gives up her child, even though she does not want to at the end. I liked how the story started off and ended with her raw birthing experience.


One line that really stood out was when she went grocery shopping by herself. “I could have felt ashamed, except for the wedding band I wear so people think I am married. I wear the ring as I walk across the street to the big market to buy groceries for myself” (84-85). Debbie wears this ring because of her shame, because women back then were looked down upon if they had kids and weren’t married. In recent times it is more acceptable to be a single mother, at least in more liberal areas like the Bay Area where she was originally living. Her mother seemed to want the best for her child, but in doing that, she caused serious emotional trauma long-term. Debbie didn’t want to give up her son, and it was cruel of the mother to make that important decision for her. At the very end of the story, she “feels a profound sadness” at giving her baby away and does not want to leave him, but is forced to by the people of authority in her life. I’d have to admit; this piece was a tear-jerker for me and let me so frustrated at the mother and adoption case worker for making Debbie give the child away. It made me want to slap! the girl to wake her up and tell her that nobody can dictate her life for her. Even though she was young, she could have made a fantastic mother. Too bad she wasn’t able to rebel against the women who wanted to keep her pregnancy a secret. Women should be able to make their own choices in life, whether it is to have an abortion or keep the child and raise it with love and compassion.


-Sienna Crespin